Saturday, March 19, 2016

Getting 'Trolleyed'...


Isn't it it incredible how at an airport the human race just forgets its "supposed-to be" civilised conduct? They push, shove, stand before the plane comes to a halt, muck up the toilets, open overhead bins, stampede out of the plane like a mob and have that frenzied look about them. But all this is delightfully saintly behaviour because then they get a trolley and turn into real monsters.They stand with their overloaded trolleys right at the entrances. They block exits. No one thinks, hello, there are passengers behind me, let me park the wheeled thing on the side before reuniting with loved ones ... or twos or tens.
Here you are genially walking out when this person spots his family and since it is mandatory to greet them smack, right dab in the middle of the Exit, he just stops. Now, you are reluctant witness to him hugging Raju and Munna and other sundry members of the family. Lady spots loving husband, gives a shriek and lets go of the trolley which then trundles into another trolley and the bags collapse and you are a helpless prisoner at the back.
Sometimes, there is no Munna to greet, the guy just pulls up to make a call on his mobile phone, oblivious to his trolley being an impediment. You have to say `scoozeme' at the rate of twenty a minute and some of these dolts don't move. They actually collect in a huddle and chat or they don't know where to go so they turn and twist and bumble along at super slow speed causing a logjam. Move it.
Then there are the rushers who think nothing of hitting you with the wheels as they zoom past. And there are some who have so much on one trolley they are a walking hazard. Five suitcases and a five-year-old sitting on top of the pile.
I had a woman the other day who was offended because i told her to get out of the way ... because you were in the way , lady , that's why . Ten to one, you will get suddenly blocked and then somebody behind you will ram into your shins. Goodbye sanity .